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Episode 4: Warm Hellos and Genuine Goodbyes

Description: This week, Dr. Boogren inspires the Self-Care Squad with genius ideas from Gretchen Rubin.


1. See Gretchen Rubin's thoughts on the matter here:

2. Listen to Gretchen Rubin's own podcast, Happier with Gretchen Rubin, here:

3. Get your copy of The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin today!

Listen Now:


Transcription: Hi. This is episode four and our second season of Self-Care for Educators, and I'm your host, Tina Boogren. I'm so happy you're here. This week's invitation. I think you're going to like it. It's a simple, easy one. Doesn't take any time. Doesn't cost any money, but it's a difference maker. Here's your invitation.

I want you to promise that you're going to engage in warm hellos and goodbyes this week. Pretty sure I got this idea from Gretchen Rubin. She's someone that I talk about a lot. She has a big influence on me. She's an author and a podcaster. And I think, I think I first heard about this idea in her book, The Happiness Project, and she also talks about this in her podcast, and I love it so much. It's just this very, very simple idea of being thoughtful about our greetings, about being sincere when we say hello and when we say goodbye. And, I think as educators, we know this ... And, I'll say this as well, I think as educators, we're really great about this with our students, but I'm going to remind us how important this is for our families and for our colleagues, as well.

I am not a morning person. I get up in the morning ... Once I've had my coffee, I'm good to go, but oh, the first few minutes are not great. But, I've committed to not being so crabby in the morning with my husband, to actually pause and say good morning in a way that feels warm and not just crabby and ridiculous. I'm committed to, for me, I'm not entering into a school building anymore, but I enter into ... oftentimes airports and just trying to ...

Here's what I love about being at the airport. People say good morning. No one says good afternoon. I don't get the same feeling in the afternoon or in the evening, but in the morning at an airport, and this is probably true anywhere, people are greeting each other. There's a whole lot of good morning's, and I love that actually. So, trying to have the smile, really look someone in the eye and say, good morning in a way that means good morning; have a great day. It's just a difference maker. And, for our families, you know, we oftentimes take for granted the people that we love the most. And so, if we spend time this week just making sure that every time we say hello or good morning or after school, when we enter into our homes or our kids come back from school, or our partners come in from work to really be happy and excited to see them.

And, I think we can ask ourselves this. When our partners walk in the room, our friends, our neighbors, the random shopper at the grocery store ... I mean, I think, gosh, just what a way to build compassion and humanity for each other, to just say hello and say goodbye in a way that feels warm and kind and nice ... When we hold the door for someone to say hello, maybe throw a sincere compliment in there, as well. Oh, when I do this, when I commit to doing this, what I've noticed is I feel ... At the end of the day, this is really an act of altruism. And, what we know is that altruism is one of the ways that we can tap into those top levels of Maslow's hierarchy. In fact, it's the very top that's transcendent--when we feel connected to something outside of ourselves. So, these acts, this act of kindness, the willingness to give warm hellos and goodbyes helps us reach the top level of Maslow, and what a gift that is.

So, making that connection as you move through your week, and you're providing these warm hellos and goodbyes, see the reaction that you get. See what happens with your family. Maybe you want to make this a public acknowledgement in your family and say, let's commit to this instead of just running in or running out the door, right? Just, hi, bye without even looking at the person. Maybe you make a commitment that we've got to look each other in the eye, say good morning and good afternoon or welcome home. I'm so glad you're here. Good night. Whatever time of day it is ... To really commit, to being really fully present with the people that we love, and the people we work with, and the students in our classroom. What a gift it is to provide that hello.

We know so often that students come to school from challenging environments where maybe they didn't have a warm hello or goodbye. And, we're the first person to say hello to them or the first person to say, I'm so happy to see you. I'm so glad you're here. What a gift this is. I can't wait for you to experiment with this. I love the picture in my head of all of us going out into the world and into our homes and just providing the gift of warm hellos and goodbyes. I can't wait to hear how it goes.

As always, a huge thank you to Brooke for making this happen. A huge thank you to Marzano Resources and Solution Tree for this incredible job I get to do. And to you, my bad-ass Self-Care Squad. So, so, so grateful for you. So incredibly grateful for you. Thank you for the work that you do. And thanks for coming back each week. You're amazing.

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